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Barman Keys and Boris Johnson discuss the attack on the family unit, until Harry drops by surreptitiously, only to find out Meghan has followed him on a separate private jet. Harry takes drastic actions to avoid being caught – which ends up giving Boris Johnson… ginger hair???
#HarryandMeghan #MeghanandHarry #Harry #PrinceHarry #Meghan #meghanmarkle #bar #barman #parody #satire #Boris #Bojo #Borisjohnson
Transcript:
Bar: The family unit is under incessant attack; the lifeforce driving academia, politics and media both news and entertainment seeks to devalue traditional family.
B: Why?
Bar: All four sectors benefit from a pliable obedient citizenry, not informed and critical collective.
B: Once again your going on one of your wondrous rambles through the coconut-scented steamroom of quasi-hippy waterdust
(barm mouths waterdust)
B: And secondly, what does it have in the slightest to do with families?
Barm: Belief is found in family, principle, standard, someone you can comfort and someone that will comfort you. Strong families are considered strong because they have strong beliefs that form strong bonds.
B: And?
Barm: Strong beliefs aren’t easily influenced by academic study, political argument, News narratives nor the indoctrinating cynicism of mainstream entertainment.
B: Right, so what you’re saying is that academics, as a collective, are annoyed that people don’t accept what they say, so their academic purasasion has gone down the route of anti-family?
Barm: Because families are described as vectors of impure thought.
(Harry enters canoeing)
B: Hello Haz. Thought we weren’t going to be seeing you for a while?
H: It’s been like three days.
B: Anyway good to see you.
Barm: Your misses is here.
H: Oh no, she must have followed me.
Barm: Not a great sign.
H: The private jet is parked around the corner, so she won’t see it. So, if I could just borrow your blonde and Barman, could I pretend I work here again?
Barm: I would if I were you
B: Here you are
(Harry takes off)
(Boris Takes)
(Harry over)
(Boris looks)
(Harry legs fall) cries out
Barm (looking down): You all right?
(Harry in pain)
Barm: You better stay down there.
(Harry still in pain)
(Meghan Enters) Boris – what have you done to your hair?
B: Oh, i just thought I’d go for something different – something a little more regal.
M: Yeah, but ginger? Anyway, as interested as I am in your hair, I’m looking for Harry and I have a private jet waiting.
B: He’s not here Meghan, haven’t seen him for a while, have we Barman?
(Barman says nothing)
B: Thanks.
(Barman’s eye gaze downwards)
(harry in pain)
M: What’s going on here, are you hiding something from me?
B: No Meghan, I cast iron guarantee that there’s nothing going on here. We haven’t’ seen Harry for a while, but that last time her was here, all he went on about was his Meghana and how she looks out for him, ok?
M: It’s so cute when you say things as though have credibility; reminds me of myself – I’ve asked him to steer of this place for a while so you won’t see him
B: Oh bad news, but, she is he who must be obeyed!
M: I haven’t got time to correct the rampant sexism in what you just said. I’m just gonna get on my private jet. So long Boris.
B: I’m sure it won’t be too long.
(Meghan Levaes)
Barm: They took two, seperate jets from from the USA to a bar in the UK, but also lecture the world on the dangers of climate change.
B: Markle’s Paradox, it’s a beautiful thing. (drinks)
